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Jack Schitt- This one is too funny/long
- Subject: Jack Schitt- This one is too funny/long
- From: "ra rabmw" <rabmw@xxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Wed, 07 Nov 2001 15:54:06 -0500
( Don't ask me why send it today...just that kind of mood)
Who is Jack Schitt?
At last the lineage for Jack is revealed. Have you ever been
utterly speechless when someone says "You don't know Jack Schitt!" With this
knowledge you can now handle this situation easily. Jack was the only son of
Awe Schitt, and O. schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O.
Schitt, the current owner of Kneedeep N. Schitt. Jack then married Noe
Schitt, and the deeply religious couple produced six offspring: Holie
Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins, Deep and Dip
Schitt. Against her parents objections, Deep Schitt, one of the twins,
later married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15
years, Jack and Noe Schitt were divorced. Noe Schitt later remarried Ted
Sherlock, and because she still had her kids living with her she chose to
retain a portion of her former name; She then became known as Noe
Schitt-Sherlock. ( Still Here? )
Meanwhile,the other twin, Dip Schitt, married Loda Schitt, and they in turn
produced a son with a nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt. Two of the other
six children of Jack SChitt, and Noe Schitt, Fulla, and Giva, were
inseperable thoughout their childhood, and later, in a dual ceremony,
married the Happens brothers. The wedding announcement in the newspapers
announced the Schitt-Happens wedding. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg,
Byrd, and HOarse. The eldest of the Schitt children, Holie, married Fred
Mann and moved away to Pocatello, Idaho where she eventually became the
senior partner in a prestigious law firm under the name of Holie
Schitt-Mann. Early on in life, the prodigal son, Bull Schitt,left home to
tour the world with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt. So now when someone
says " You don't know Jack Schitt!", you can correct them. Family
history recorded bby Crock o. Schitt, and Ima Schitt.
endit.......
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