Fiat Auto p**p list (joke)

[MARCANTONIO Sandro Giulio <sandrogiulio.marcantonio@domain.elided>]

Just to let everyone know, unofficially, as suggested by APE and Larry Jr.,
I have started my own:


UNOFFICIAL FIAT AUTO S.p.A ALFA ROMEO IN THE USA 2005 Alfa Digest p**p
LIST:(which will be posted behind my desk here at Fiat Auto in
Torino)Results will be kept confidential until the first cars are shipped
into the United States. Anyone on the list will have there orders cancelled
and the next person in line will receive their new Alfa Romeo. No crying
please. Copy's of the p**p list will be sold prior to 2005 for $49.95.
Details and timing coming soon. A perfect stocking stuffer for your favorite
Alfa Romeo Parts Retailer to judge current and future clients.

It's going to be easy for many of you to qualify. Your posts will be scanned
for the following criteria. If these criteria are found you will be added to
the list.

1)Make stupid, unfounded, unconfirmed comments or assumptions on the digest
about Alfa's Return to the States.

2)Make any remark regarding Isuzu engines, Powerglide transmissions, Pontiac
etc. in the context of Alfa Romeo.

3)Degrading Italians or their work habits, traits etc..

4)Believing anything written in the NYT's as official information.

5)Spelling Agnelli wrong. Example from digest #15

("Hate to tell you this, but that will never happen. The inside word in
Italy 
is that Fiat will simply be another division of GM. This is just a gradual 
phasing out of the Angellis.")

Wow that is the weirdest Italian name I have ever seen, looks French. Is
that the guy who signs my check?

6)Confusing me with my friend Luca who is another Italian Alfa Digester.

7)Starting your own Alfa Return Rumor (as judged by me)

8)Judging anything after the Alfa 75 not a "real Alfa Romeo."

9)Making cracks about the Italian Postal Service

10)Claim that Swedes are designing Alfa Romeo cars in Sweden by themselves

11)Any mention of putting the Buick 3.8 V-6 in the new Alfa's

12)Misspell at any time Alfa Romeo, (such as Alpha Romeo, Alfa Romero or
Alpha Romero etc...)

13)Any claim that Italians are lazy, don't work hard, and take too many
coffee breaks. (hey, if I have to be here 12-14 hours a day I just can't
stand for that kind of comment.:)

14)Jinxing Alfas return by saying, "It will never work, Italians don't know
how to market.", "GM screws up everything they touch.", "It isn't going to
happen people." etc.....

15)Visiting Torino and not calling your good friend Sandro at Fiat Auto to
go out and gab about Alfas, talk about the funny people on the digest that
know everything about anything etc..


I will open up this list to any suggestions, comments etc...Fiat Auto S.p.A
is an equal opportunity employer.

******Note, The information in this email in no way expresses the views or
opinions of Fiat S.p.A in any way.*******

I hope this can become a fun experience for us all.

I will send a report daily of all new editions to the list. ENJOY! All posts
before v8#20 are excluded. Starting with #21 every post is fair game.

enjoy!



Sincerely,

Sandro Marcantonio
Strength and Honor
Long Live Alfa Romeo

1988 Alfa Romeo 75 3.0 V-6  (In Colorado sleeping)
1993 155 Q4 2.0 Turbo Integrale (New Turbine, 230 hp, twisted sister)How can
you say this isn't a real Alfa, it sounds like one, it drives like one,it
smells like one, and gosh darnit, it puts a big smile on my face, for me it
is an Alfa Romeo.

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